I find myself in a hard situation with a Muslim man I love.
I write because I don’t have resources within the Muslim community and would love that perspective.
Although living close to each other they had not met before running into each other on this day on the road leading up the hill to their neighborhood.
Both seemed quite determined to assert themselves that day, and soon they began pushing each other that gradually turned to wrestling, and attempts to dominate.
This post is my little attempt at clearing up some of the misconceptions regarding the Arab/American marriages.
Perhaps I should clarify a bit; my husband is not only an Arab, but he’s a bedoin (desert) Arab.
You meet, you hit it off, you get really excited because you’ve finally found a great guy, and after that…silence.
Once you’ve hit day 4 all hope dissipates and you must sadly accept the fact that you will never be hearing from him.
Some even ‘warned’ me before making the decision to get married.However, it wasn’t until I broke the rules that I realized this type of situation can’t be so easily explained, or dismissed.Experience is the best teacher of all and this particular experience was an eye-opener and game-changer for sure. I met up with a friend one Saturday afternoon at a bar for a football game. He was cute, charming, and we seriously hit it off right away.But he also embraces the more positive things about the bedoin culture, such as how women should be treated.Unfortunately there are a lot of misconceptions about how bedoin men treat their wives, and until you’re married to one, I suggest you don’t assume.The intrinsic interest in these fields by most people is shared by social psychologists, and attachment, attraction, and love relationships constitute one of the most prolific areas of investigation in social psychology.The early attachment theory advanced by Bowlby (1982) emphasized the importance of the field when he suggested that our attachments to parents to a large extent shape all succeeding relationships in the future.From the beginning it has been clear that there are obstacles to our being together and we kept it very casual and light, but in the past few months we have become much, much closer and he expressed his love for me, and now I have allowed myself to love him very dearly also.However, what just happened a couple hours ago brought our true situation very present to me.He’s actually more Westernized than many ‘city’ Arabs I know.His English is perfect, he’s been to America and fully understands our mentality, culture, and politics.