Lately, I have been better able to look at those issues troubling me in a relationship as opportunities for introspection first before turning my gaze toward the other person.
I might still conclude that someone is not the best match for me for various reasons.
We spoke with relationship coach and Your Tango expert Lewis Denbaum to get to the bottom of these statistics."The last time I got divorced, which was in 2003, my blood pressure went through the roof," said Denbaum.
"I had to start taking blood pressure medicine for the first time in my life."As someone who had been practicing transcendental meditation for over 30 years, Denbaum was surprised to find that while going through his second divorce, his meditation techniques had no effect whatsoever."I realized then that I had to step outside of the box of my life, and examine my thoughts and beliefs," he said.
If, after each milestone of “testing the waters,” my partner seems demonstrably trustworthy, then it is incumbent upon me to try to open up a little bit more each time and experiment with being fully present in the relationship, stitched up heart and all.
"Men have to break though the ' I've got to do it myself and go it alone' attitude."It turns out that in the age-old battle of the sexes, men seem to be having a more difficult time coping with the dissolution of a marriage.
According to a recent study from the Journal of Men's Health, divorced men are more susceptible to heart disease, high blood pressure, and strokes than married men are — in addition to being 39 percent more likely to commit suicide and engage in risky behavior.
Emotional availability in a relationship can sometimes seem as elusive as the Holy Grail.
I know how precious this quality is and most definitely a part of the treasure I seek in a solid relationship.