The "booby prize" in life is trying to understand or change the behavior of an emotionally unavailable person.
Ironically, most emotionally unavailable people are easy to spot, quite transparent, showing you their true colors, right from the beginning.We hadn’t even made it official and he was talking about breaking up. When I saw him on a dating site six weeks after the split (after him telling me earlier that he didn’t want to see other people; he just wasn’t ready for a relationship), I panicked.He told me he didn’t want to lose me, nor did he want his baggage to ruin what we had. This lasted for all of about twenty-four hours when he ended it. I confronted him about it and he took no accountability for ending things the way he did.They may have suffered through a troubled childhood experience that has wounded them or they now have higher priorities such as their career or taking care of a sick parent.Perhaps, they are recently divorced or widowed, and legitimately not ready to get involved in an intimate relationship.“When someone tells you who they are, believe them.” ~Maya Angelou After having been a rebound girl the summer of 2013, I swore I would never get involved with another emotionally unavailable man who had baggage and was a poor communicator.I thought I was a pro at all of the tell tale signs. He came on very strong in the beginning, telling me he deleted his dating app after our first date, that he turned down other dates because he didn’t want to waste time with other girls, and showed me in more ways than one that I was his priority. Things were at the height of our relationship, and I use this word loosely because it really wasn’t a relationship.It’s no secret that generally the more emotionally damaged a woman is the more enticing she is. It can start with a look on the subway, a brush of her hand against yours at your local Trader Joe’s as you reach for a cucumber, or a polite and perky “Excuse me, how many sets do you have left? Regardless of HOW you meet her, I can guarantee that for once in your life you feel that ‘special’ something with her.She knows exactly how to look at you, how to touch you and how to engage with you on a conversational level that entices you to taste of the forbidden fruit. You might think she’s your soul mate (see Rollo Tomassi’s post here), or even as something as light as you thinking ‘hell, this is a really cool unique girl unlike ANY of the other club sluts I’ve been banging’.You pull out a piece of paper and jot down ways to get her back: Elaborate gift? My intention with this guide is to provide a framework of sorts for men around the world who read this blog to use as a reference point for when they date girls. At the least this guide will help you avoid wasting your time, money and energy on a damaged woman. There are six parts to this post, all posted below. We’ve ALL been there and if you haven’t, I truly pray you don’t, but for most of us we’ve experienced the devastating effects of dealing with a tragic breakup. This post isn’t for us to have a collective woe is me pity party.